By Adolf Kaure

A 27-year-old woman from Walvis Bay, Samantha Claasen recalls how she has had a lengthy ordeal of mental health issues, stigma and isolation due to three botched breast reduction surgeries which happened in 2024. 
Speaking to Confidente, an emotional Claasen said that she underwent her first breast reduction surgery during October 2024 due to chronic back pain experienced for many years. 
“As a woman this breast reduction operation has put me through a lot. I suffer from anxiety and depression. I was put on the Amitriptyline antidepressant pills and I was not told about their side effects and this made me feel even,” Claasen narrated.
“I know I am a laughing stock to some, especially to friends and some people I know and it feels like an embarrassment,” she added. According to Claasen, the pain was a result of her breasts being too large (38DD - bra size) since she was eleven years old in 2008 and she did not think that they would grow to the size (42DD - bra size), which they were before the three surgeries (two in October 2024 and one in November 2024).
“After all these procedures none of them were successful. It was just complications after complications. I did not go for cosmetic surgery. I went because I had chronic back pain for years and it was unbearable and as a woman with big breasts the self-esteem was hard to deal with.” 
The mother of two added: “It has been ten months since the last operation and there has not been any improvements. I cannot be in the sun too long, then my breasts start to burn and also in the cold. Everyday I am in pain. For a woman, her breasts are her everything, but since this tragedy happened to me, I have no self-confidence and there are just tears and fears every day of my life.”
“Whenever I look in the mirror or get dressed, I break down in tears. There are times that I can't describe how I feel, but generally I feel shattered,” Claasen lamented.
Unable to work because of stigma and feeling like a social outcast, Claasen has become a shadow of herself. However, despite the depression and stigma, Claasen is grateful for her mother, Ruth Müller, who has stood by her all the way, providing her with financial and emotional support. 
“Samantha changed completely and now she wants to take her own life. I have to keep a watchful eye on her daily. She starts breaking down in tears and it never stops. She questions why the doctor did this to her,” Müller said. 
The 65-year-old pensioner supports her daughter daily, saying that Claasen has become ashamed of being seen in public.
“She goes nowhere without me. The painkillers do not even help and when she is in pain, I sit with her. She cannot do anything by herself. I do everything for her and it is a heartbreaking thing. It is a wound that can never be healed. As I receive my monthly money as a pensioner, I provide for her with the little that I have,” she added.  With local doctors reluctant to operate on her to restore her bosom, Claasen’s only hope is a South African doctor, who has given her the chance to restore her breasts for an exorbitant fee of over N$72,000.
A 2022 survey done by Statista on the effects of body image found that 46 percent of 18-24 year olds and 41 percent of 25-34 year olds globally reported negative effects on their well-being.  Psychological counselor at the Ministry of Labour in the Erongo Region, Marcella Katjijova explained the significance of breasts to a woman’s mental wellbeing.
“When it comes to body image, there are a few things that speak to the gender of any person. When it comes to the female anatomy the biology of the hormones and periods defines one becoming a woman even if she is sub-conscious,” said Katjijova. 
“When it comes to body image that affects one’s health, specifically large breasts. They do affect their posture and carry. Breast reduction surgery helps women’s back structure, helping them become more comfortable, walk straight, with elegance and in a sense of womanhood. This helps them do daily tasks with ease,” she explained.
Katjijova also explained how a woman can lose her identity and can get mentally ill after a botched breast operation.
“When a botched image, where more harm is done and regret falls in. That leads to body dysmorphia disorder (BDD), where the woman feels like they are not good enough or woman enough.”